currently...

gaga-obsessed. ( sorry helen!! )

p.s. her eyelashes are peeking out on top of her bangs. HAH feROSH!

tweet tweet

i love changing my fb status a little too much, so i just moved right on to twitter! :)

more Gaga

It's good to live expensive
You know it, but my knees get weak intensive
When you give me k-kisses

That's money, honey

Hi, Spring!

omggg, almost left an entire pile of my school stuff on the cafeteria table! totally stopped dead in my tracks and ran back to get it. i don't know how that even happened. a bright red notebook and a hot pink folder.. eh, if i'm going to be this clumsy the rest of the quarter, i'm going to have problems!! i really have this huge fear of losing things. when things are misplaced, i totally freak out until i find it. r.i.p. iphone earphones, i'll never know where yalls went!!


so anyway it was probably just because i was rushing to turn in my research eval from last quarter that was due 2 Wednesdays ago... at least i even remembered to turn it in!!

anyway, i then casually peruse facebook and caught something on my home page that was pretty traumatizing!!

Sherwin Li just f*cked his own bed. (his status)
James Paul Spellicy comments: and you loved it and will do it again this evening.

mind you, Mr. Spellicy is one of our econ teachers from high school. and sherwin... is my brother. HAHA. i dont know, i just found this exchange quite disturbing and inappropriate!!!

one more class from 3-6pm and first day of school is ova!!

no shame!

Lets have some fun, this beat is sick
I wanna take a ride on your disco stick


...disco stick??? haha!

do what you love and fuck the rest.

678-999-8212

i had a surprisingly good time in LA, despite initially being bitter about having to leave SF so early.

i was kinda glad i was in the apt alone for most of the daytime because i think it looked a hot mess with me sewing frantically with pieces of hair extension laying everywhere. i made my own clip ins for fun. pieces of hair got everyfuckin'where and i had to run around with a lint roller afterwards to clean up my mess! anyways, it was still a good way to pass the day.

i was excited for spring quarter to start but as it crawls closer, i'm not really anymore. going to class is fine.. it's just the non-stop extracurricular meetings that are killer and soo draining. my schedule looks pretty empty - as if i haven't finished signing up for classes yet. I assumed that I didn't get an internship i interviewed for because they never got back to me, but the professor contacted me over break and then ensued a chain of confusing emails which just ended with him telling me to see him the first day of class to clear up the matter. i'm taking more North Campus classes than South Campus for the first time eva! and i don't have classes on Friday so i can reserve it for research :). i hope everyone who took MCATs today came out alive and kickin'!! wishing them all the best =)

anyways, saw a bunch of little boppers on campus today waiting in line for the kids choice awards. i watched some of it on TV and im so shocked at the grandeur of the set up & stage when PCD performed. you can't even tell it's Pauley.. but then again i haven't been inside there more than 3 times so maybe i don't remember what it really looks like!

saw a few movies this week:

He's Just Not That Into You - such a cute movie!! the general message is very very honest. most girls and all the shitty things that happen to them - that's the rule. the girl who gets her happy ending despite the shitty circumstances - she's the exception. i found the main girl (Ginnifer Goodwin?) to be soo annoying and pathetic. she was relatable because i think all girls could see a part of themselves in that character, but the combination of all those traits - wow, irritating. i think it's ironic that almost all the girls become an "exception" in the end - which i think totally negates the point they were trying to make in the first place. but yeah, who wants to watch a movie where everyone ends up heartbroken and sad in the end... gotta instill a little hope in people ya know!

I Love You, Man - soooooooooo funny, sooooo awkward. surprised that i ended up loving it. loves it. loves it!

The Family Man - an oldie. watched it today on hulu.com... a movie about values.. materialism + emptiness vs. simplicity+happiness. the age-old conflict! loved it. tea leoni is so pretty!


i used this makeup remover that blurs my eyesight. umm, that's not good is it? i literally feel like i'm going blind! it's probably because the oil got on my eyeball or something.. yeah, perhaps i should stop using it.

i'm in LOVEE with bow wow, soulja boy, mario right now - you know, that kind of music. In "Kiss Me Thru The Phone", soulja boy raps a phone number so we decide to call it and some dude picked up. shocked, i hung up right away and start laughing hysterically. omg! i wonder who that was. we googled it and theres actually several threads pondering the same question. some naive young'ns really think it's soulja boy! hahaha... some think it's the hotline..? maybe? anyway, the area code is Atlanta, GA. i feel bad for that guy if he's just some random dude that happens to have that phone number!!!

does anyone else think Soulja Boy and Sammie look alike - or is that totally racist of me??? -____-

currently, i want to go karaoke-ing and sing/rap Kiss Me Thru the Phone at the top of my lungs.. i'm so in love with that song. Also, I just started liking Come Over - Estelle + Sean Paul. it's.. like... sensual, HAHA.

yep - my thoughts are so disorganized! good night all!


clueless lookin' picture of me - but just wanted to show my (temporary) long hair!

sad :(

today.

seriously, my blog is just like music videos. i find them the easiest way to convey my thoughts anyway.

(ghetto) hookah is fun. spiced WARM wine is not. karaoke is sooo fun. chugging Skyy Citrus on the floor.... in the corner... is even more fun. all the effects of these vices combined... not fun. i'm slightly nauseated but i think it was totally worth it.

one last day tomorrow. doing something classically SF and classically sushii - downtown shopping and lunch. i'm so sad that half my break is going to be spent in LA, doing pretty much nothing, but i figure that i'll save money that way and also get a little more prepared for school. :)


p.s. got some of my grades back. happy but also pissed. oh well. i tried. next time will be better.

Bopper.

everyone likes this song. everyone. (even guys, you know who you is! HAHA)




Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter
And my daddy said stay away from Juliet
But you were everything to me
I was begging you, please don't go
And I said,

Romeo, save me they're tryna tell me how to feel
This love is difficult, but it's real
Don't be afraid we'll make it out of this mess
It's a love story, baby just say yes

Emergency Room

do you not think it is totally inappropriate for this song to be released now?


You gone be in the Emergency Room
You standing by my bed
And so-tempted to pull out my IV
You gone be in the Emergency Room
I'm fightin' with myself
I can't hurt you even though you hurt me


-------
insomniac. help.

we are old enough to know but too young to care

open ears, open heart

home sweet home

coming home is always interesting. there's a strange re-adjusting period because i'm not used to being around family. my immediate family is amazing, but it's my extended family that makes me feel so weighed down. i automatically feel less free when i'm at home - literally, because i dont have a car & i'm not really living near any of my friends. and figuratively, because i'm hearing my aunties talk about how they have so these expectations and "suggestions" for how i should play out my future.

i know i'm supposed to live my life how i want, but when they tell me this is what my career, husband, family should be like in 10 or 20 years - and with my mom nodding her head in agreement with them, i can't help but think that the decisions that i'm probably going to make will disappoint them. family is so important to me. what they think, want, say - i take it all into consideration because i do respect them a lot but sometimes i just wonder - why do i have to be this certain kind of doctor? why do i have to be with this certain kind (*race*) of guy? it is infuriating and frustrating because i feel like there are a few really close-minded people in my family and as much as i could try to explain myself to them, i feel it would be a waste of my time because i don't think that i need to defend any of my actions in the first place - and ultimately, they would never understand and talk smack anyway.

this is why i keep a lot of things from my family. Regardless of how important or eager i am to share my life with them, i suspect that they will never accept the truth of my reality and instead constantly judge the fact that i'm not doing it their way - instead of reveling in my decisions along with me. and really, that's just all unnecessary DRAMA. they do believe that i have a good head on my shoulders but it's because they think i want all the same things for myself that they want for me... and that really isn't true. i wish i could be a lot more candid about who i really am in front of them but i feel like i'm in such a liberal place in my life now that they won't be able to fully trust my perspective and may instead attribute it to some kind of angsty rebel phase. i feel like it would just be invasive to let too much of my personal life leak out... i really don't want them to sound that difficult. and for people who has had family who is supportive/apathetic, it may be hard to understand. it is just ridiculous. sometimes i'd rather they be more "whatevs" than so involved.. i wish i could not care what they think but bottom line, they are family and they super matter and last thing i want to do is disappoint them, but i feel like i'm not the one that's going to meet their standards. i'm just different - perhaps my brother can fill that spot.

i grew up in SF and my family is here, and i wish i could say that i want to come back to the bay after undergad/grad school for work/school. but the more i think about it, the more i realize i don't. after talking to janice today, im thinking that perhaps SF is not a perfect match for me. i never expected that i would love LA as much as i have grown to love it, or experience this level of freedom and independence and clarity. i definitely want to take advantage of my time left here, since i'm probably going to have to leave it come time for grad school.

THank you, Magazine Gods!

coppin' this next issue. LOVEEEEE me some blair waldorf, queen bee action !

I guess studying for Psych is relatively fun... compared to the
auditory system and nutrition. I actually picked up some interesting
facts, which i'm going to turn into advice to live life. Haha, so pick
a topic and we can discuss!! I know yalls are probably itching to know
about the romantic relationships chapter ;)

HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!!!!

in celebration... these green beauties by Jil Sander! Did i tell you guys i bought a similar Royal Blue pair from Nine West a while back? Well, long story short, I broke them, HAHA. fail. sad :(


going to Irish Catholic St. Anne's, i quickly got the perception that St. Patty's Day was as big as Christmas. Of course, now that i'm in college, I can hardly remember.. until i come across an overzealous celebrator and get pinched by them...i.e. Yuki from lab!

in high school, i found a four-leaf clover in that field between lowell and the stonestown parking lot. i put it in a book to press it but true to form, i have no idea where i put the book or even which book it was in, for that matter...oops.

anyway, how appropriate to have a day of *luck* during finals week. today's the last push before my double whammy finals tmrw and i am seriously hoping all this will pay off because i've never studied so consistently and so long to study for finals (which is bad because i should have been working like this since first year, haha).

maybe i will celebrate by taking a *little* sip of Bailey's tonight. =]

p.s. today's weather is amazing ~ which explains why i'm in such a good mood. seriously, there's nothing like fresh spring air (well, as fresh as city air can get) and a bright, happy sun! AND i finally woke up early enough to get to the library at an acceptable hour (10am) so, yay!

the female way

Term: Rumination

definition: talking about or trying to figure out their negative feelings

rumination increases depression in three ways:
1. interferes with instrumental, productive behavior
2. makes other negative feelings and negative memories more salient
3. leads people to make pessimistic explanations for negative events


by contrast, men are more likely than women to respond by playing sports and avoiding thoughts about the reasons for their depression, a.k.a. distraction


Psychology of Gender, Chapter 13: Mental Health

redlips.

But I had to let go of the pain

Let love rain down on me




[lol at the freeze frame of the video]

Library -_-

you're right helen. this is scary.. like a murder scene kinda.

ugh i hate CSOs (fake po-po equivalent for library patrol)
getting all power hungry, barkin' at us to take out our IDs and dispose of our food

uuuum, are you trying to kill us college students?!

if i'm going to be sitting in the lib for 12 hours.. i'm going to need to eat! shouldn't be okay if i'm careful and clean? hmph.

sorry if you're a CSO and you somehow stumble upon this.. but you guys are meen -__-

on another note, i really need to walk around or something. my ass feels like a pancake from sitting for so long. and my brain feels like dough!!! ahhhhhhh. well, i had facebook tetris to refresh it :)


p.s. isn't that the cutest banner ever? except i wouldn't really want to be kissing a guy who read Men's Vogue... hmmm, questionable. [i think they stopped running it anyway, not enough metrosexuals around to subscribe!]

update

F My Life.com's slogan:
My life sucks but I don't give a fuck

AHAHAHA

anyway, day #4 in the library ~ it is packed beyond belief!


(pc:nitrolicious)

i always end up staring at this picture, and on a recent trip to Zara with ellen, i saw them in person!!! i would like to say that these are necessary but with a $169 price tag... too rich for my blood! i'm going to buy that nailpolish though. :)

IDAF

don't know if that's a blessing or a curse

life is ridonkydonk.


thisiswhyyourefat.com
fmylife.com

OMFGGGGG fuck you hair cells.

faaaaack facccck fack.

that is all i would like to say about academics.


i'm sad that i don't like chris brown anymore. i've been listening to his songs on Pandora and they're so good! apparently him and Riri are back together. According to my Psych of Gender class, about 1/3 of women stay in an abusive relationship. =[



The MacBook i borrowed from CLICC is so weird. they're all like this.. the buttons are opposite from my laptop at home... and right click doesnt work. and god knows how many greasy& germy hands have touched the keys before me!! pure nastiness. haha!

today's weather was perfect. sunny but breezy. perf. perf. perf.

i love research. it's so exciting to see what i get when i look under the scope. it's a really nice balance - the experiment itself is so simple but in the last step, you image with an incredibly advanced, mind-bogglingly complicated machine. it's crazzzy. i love it. but i hate how time-consuming it is. bittersweet.

i blog a lot when im studying. HAHAHA

im pretty sure she started it...

in response to..
We are living in a material world with selfish, self-absorbed, self-motivated human beings who only care about self-advancement and unsentimental material trends.


oh well! how boring would life be? HAHA

i like this.

"Jack of all trades and master of none."



sorry all my entries have been quotes only but they pretty much get my point across. =]

p.s. got new black suede boots because mine are over 2 years old and apparently have holes because my feet & socks somehow got wet while i was trudging through the rain yesterday.

p.p.s. i want to give bright red lips a try.

p.p.p.s. i also want to try honey colored contacts, just for fun ~


judgement [week] is coming. i seriously hate finals, because it is then when i always lose my grade i.e. A- --> B+... blah

be the change you wish to see in the world

rushing like an idiot

as much as you'd like to think you've learned your lesson, it will always come back with a refresher course.



You will be as much value to others as you have been to yourself.

“Laugh, and the world laughs with you; Weep, and you weep alone.”

"You are you and I am I, and if by chance we find each other, then it is beautiful."

Mad

It's all for nothing
fighting for nothing
crying for nothing
but we won't let it go for nothing
this should be nothing to a love like what we got

i don't wanna go to bed mad at you
And i don't want you to go to bed mad at me